For the last several years, Penn + Teller have organized a blood drive in the area to help out the community. Liz and I get wind of this and decide it would be cool to support their cause and help some people out, so we get ourselves to the blood center. Now, I am not a big fan of needles. I have had them around all my life with all the surgeries and such, but I don’t like them. Be that as it may, we get there and sign in, get the “pre-screen” interview and paperwork done and then we get called back. Liz goes in first, and I get called a few moments later. I get into the room and there she is, sitting in the chair getting her arm cleaned and her veins checked. I sit down with my Gatorade and get ready for the stab. The staffer that was there to hook me up and “stick me” went to fill out my paperwork. While this was going on, Liz was hooked up and the blood was flowing. I look over to make sure she is ok, and then realize that I am not so comfortable. Needles. Ick. So I drink some Gatorade. They check my veins and wrap my arm. At this moment Liz starts to feel funky. I look over to make sure shes ok, shes very pale and needs some water. Now I’m a bit nervous and start to feel dizzy. I grab the Gatorade to hydrate myself. Next thing I know, the Gatorade is on my lap, literally, and I had passed out. Before the needle came anywhere near my arm. Needless to say, I declined to donate. After I came to and started to relax, I look back over at Liz who is still pale, and the next thing I know, shes got her head in a bag and is throwing up. It was at this point I look down and realize I’m sitting in a puddle of spilled Gatorade. Of course, the spill pattern looks exactly like if one were to piss themselves, so there I was, ice-packs on my head looking like I just pee’d myself, while my girlfriend was throwing up while giving blood. — Let me tell ya, we sure know how to have fun at a blood drive. In summary, I passed out before the needle even touched me, Liz threw up and because I dropped the Gatorade on myself, I left the blood center looking as if I have pee’d my pants. At least Liz managed to actually donate blood.
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